No Shame In the Struggle
It can often feel as though reality collides with our ideals with a rather jarring force. We may face disappointment after disappointment in ourselves, others, and the world around us. But we must recall that the nature of human existence is not that we always find ourselves with our faces turned toward the kindest of suns or the most gentle of rains. Furthermore, not only are we imperfect sometimes in our assessment of what is right, but we may also frequently find that even a right choice is not always a satisfactory one, there being many that are "right" from which to select but perhaps only a few, just one, or even none seeming to be truly "good". And then there is the matter of it being difficult, at times, to do what we think is best when our feelings or other matters apparently stand in the way.
The tension of emotions, circumstances, decisions, and outcomes is about as common an experience of being human as one can have. Even for those for whom the ideal is that one should allow a simple flow and not engage in striving, collision with the many and varied occurrences of life can still feel difficult and strenuous. When this is so, pretending otherwise to oneself is of no use. The truth will make itself known sooner or later, without consent.
That we struggle at times is not shameful, even if we come to the point of feeling as though we were at the very edge of the world, nearly tipping over into oblivion. We must take heart and be patient with ourselves. We all to often wrestle ourselves to the ground long before our outside concerns overtake us.
We will not always feel noble or brave as we face conditions within and without and are challenged. We may feel we accomplish nothing so much as presenting a comical picture as we seem to flail uselessly about. But what we see of ourselves in our moments of greatest doubt and fear is not necessarily an accurate view of who we are and what we are about. Were we to step back during those moments and view ourselves with rationality, detachment, and compassion, we would not likely be so harsh. We might, in fact, recognize the courage that is hidden from our sight while we are in the fray.
Let us not punish ourselves for crimes not committed, whether they be criminal actions we did not undertake or actions we did undertake but which were not criminal. If we must improve, let us endeavor to do so - without dashing any hopes we may have by imprisoning ourselves within our own judgmental minds. And let us do what we can in the midst of the simple fact of our being imperfect, even if we must sometimes admit outright to having been wrong. We need not sacrifice the drive towards betterment in order to find an acceptance of ourselves. If this balance is so hard for so many to find, let the attempt continue anyway. There is no shame in the struggle.
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