6/28/98
It was when I got there that, for the first time in my life, I felt how young I really was. At 30, that still hasn't worn off yet, though the shock of my survival has. Now I just feel new. I'm in love with café windows and green and my evolving future - the one I didn't know I had and still can't imagine. Love is good for people, and there may yet be some for me. In the throes of my disability, I sometimes get angry with my body for being in pain and frustrated with it for being weak. But I respect it for how good it's been to me despite what it cannot help. I hate the assumptions of men as a privileged class, but I love men as people with me. They're beautiful as people. And I love women. Even when I enjoy my solitude most. And always when I want to be more than myself alone.
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